Succeeding In Relationships

Welcome back to Six Minutes. It’s Bob Proctor and I’m going to give you a very valuable idea here, and it will definitely give you Results that Stick in an area that a lot of people miss.

It’s in relationships. How do you build a real, meaningful relationships? I’m not just talking about your spouse, the person you love, or a person you’re looking for to love. I’m talking about with your friends, with your relatives, with your own kids, with the people at work, just with people in general. How do you build meaningful relationships? Well did you know there’s a very basic law covering that? It’s called the law of cause and effect?

That’s I suppose why Emerson said, “The law of cause and effect was the law of laws.” And it’s very clear, it states for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. In other words what you put out you’re going to get back. So how do you build meaningful relationships? Well first of all you have to train yourself to take the focus off yourself. And I guarantee you ninety-something percent of the population grow up very sort of self-centered thinking of our self. We’re trying to “get.” When the secret is “give” and you will receive. You see “givers” gain. Well forget about yourself and think about the other person. Bring all of your conscious attention to the other person.

There was a man in Canada, Brian Linehan. Brian interviewed celebrities and they loved him interviewing them. Brian was a fairly quiet guy. He’s gone now. Man he was the best interviewer. I used to love watching him. First of all he did his research he really understood a lot about the person he was sitting down to interview but all his conscious attention (if you could see his energy lit up in color you would see it like a flashlight focused right on the person he was dealing with). He didn’t talk much he asked questions, and he really focused on the individual he was dealing with. And do you know he built very powerful relationships and he did it because he was so effective at what he was doing?

When you just give all of your attention to what makes the other person happy? What will improve the quality of their life? How can you move them toward their pre-determined goals? Find out what they’re working on? And think how can I help them get there? Bring all of your attention on them. Now they may be in a bad mood and snap back at you. You don’t react. Reacting and responding is another subject I’ll come back into that. You understand that well something’s probably bothering them and they may have misdirected their energy at me. But it’s not really me they’re upset with. First of all I know I’m a nice person. I know I’m worthwhile and I know that I’m giving good energy, so I know that they’re disposition is not caused by my behavior it’s something that’s troubling them and it’ll pass. And you’ll find that if you keep being nice to that person they will begin being very nice to you. It’s the law of life if you want to build a meaningful, lasting relationship, get into the habit of thinking of the other person. How you can help them? How you can serve them? And I guarantee you it’ll all come back.

Lord Chesterfield gave some excellent advice to his son. He said, “My son, cause other people to like themselves just a little bit better.” And he said, “I’ll promise you this, they’ll like you very much.” So as you go through the day today everyone you come in contact with think. What can I say? What can I do that would really improve the quality of their life? That would serve them? That would make them feel good about themselves? You’re not doing it to get good energy back; you’re doing it because you love causing other people to feel better. Think of that all day long and you’ll find you like that! They’ll start responding and you’ll be very rich in relationships. Now I’ve been working at that for a long time. I have meaningful friends all over the world and you know something you will too. You will get results in relationships.

You’re going to come up with Results that Stick.

This is Bob Proctor and thank you.